How Not To Break Up With A Girl

Today, everyone has become philosophers, dishing out relationship tips here and there. The environment is saturated with it already, and you might really get bored at every instant someone starts to lecture you on things like - don’t date this type, boys are scum and should be treated as such, girls are cheap to get and if one leaves another comes, and some other long boring stories that our ears bear on our behalf.

Well, I must tell you this particular piece is also one of those boring pieces you would read, but unlike others, I am not trying to prove a point, or portraying myself as a geek in relationship. In fact, I am a novice, and if you had read my Nostalgia: Love is a State of Being, you would not be wrong to ask me if I am actually in my right state of mind to be writing this, not when I had said I am waiting for the loml to join me in the relationship I am having with her.

So what then does my “How not to break up with a girl” contain?

In my school of thought, as the goal of every relationship is to grow, so also the goal of break-up is to one day when you see each other in the supermarket, or Mall, you can run into each other’s arm and chitchat afterwards, or tell your current partner with a big smile on your face that, you see that girl I just hugged, she’s my very good friend, rather than the usual saying of that’s my ex. The word “ex” in the context will connote disrespect no matter the tone of your voice.

Last night, I had trouble getting to sleep. I had just cleaned up some mess I thought I had cleaned up in 2019. It wasn’t easy telling her during the telephone call that I was breaking up with her, so I chose the other way, which was through a text message. From the outset, I had led her on into what she perceived as a relationship, got engrossed in it, and on noticing this, I withdrew with the thought she would get over it and we would be friends again. But I was wrong.

The first thing to note when breaking up is the choice of your words. They really matter a lot, but you may decide not to care about your words if you’re a playboy, (but I don’t believe anyone is). The words you say at that moment would make the other person perceive whether the breakup is a ditch or not. Imagine telling her, she’s a kind heart and you feel yourself is not worthy of such a kind heart, compare to telling it to her face, bluntly, that you’re tired of the relationship. What bell would that ring?

How not to break up with a girl is simply not crushing her self-esteem while breaking her heart. They may be two different things but one may lead to the fatal degradation of the other. As said earlier, this is another boring stories you’d read about relationship, and also very importantly, it is not applicable to every relationship as personality and goal of relationship differ. But if the goal of the relationship was to grow, then a good break-up still accentuates that goal.

Note: Consider this as one of the random things a person under the influence of sedative can write, but if you found any sense in this, you can give me a clap, otherwise, air you opinion about it in the comment section. Also, I would have finished this piece earlier, but I didn’t want to crush the personality of the girl seated beside me in the public transit, as I thought like I did to her while she was pressing her phone, she would also peep into my phone while I was typing this.

Thinker and Writer | Design Enthusiast | Advocate for Inclusive Digital Skills At Secondary Education Level. "I am lost, and I want to be found."

Thinker and Writer | Design Enthusiast | Advocate for Inclusive Digital Skills At Secondary Education Level. "I am lost, and I want to be found."